Calvin's porch

The other day I was talking with a close friend of mine, and some how or another we ended up talking about 5 point Calvinism. I argued (as a joke) that you could apply the same principal to many everyday tasks...for example, sanding a cedar wood porch. Here goes...

1/ This cedar wood porch porch is Total Depraved. There is nothing this porch can do to improve itself...

2/ Out of my mercy (and love for power tools) I have unconditionally elected to transform the cedar wood porch into something new and beautiful once again. By my own judgement and choice I have predestined the porch for transformation...

3/ The sanding process it limited (atonement) by my prior choice and sovereign judgement; the redemptive nature of my power sander is extended to no other part of the house unless I so choose to do so....

4/ If I so choose to redeem my porch by sanding it, and transforming it, there is nothing the porch can do to resist my effort. It cannot overcome in anyway the irresistible grace of my black and decker power sander...

5/ No matter how dirty or weathered the porch becomes after I transformed, there is nothing the porch can do to reverse the transformation process. The porch will perservere in it's transformation.


All joking aside...praise God for his unconditional election and his sovereign grace in allowing me to be adopted into his family. As Spurgeon says...'I thank God everyday for choosing me, for if he hadn't I am certain I would not have chosen him.'